630am : My alarm rings. No sounds of stirring through the monitor. No matter, kiddo doesn't really have to wake till 640am. Close my eyes for a quick catnap.
645am : Open my eyes thinking, 'Oh s@*#! Late!' Still no signs 0f kiddo stirring. Well, can't be helped, she has to get up. Crawl under the covers with her and try to gently wake her up. My mom used to yank the covers off me and slap a sopping wet towel on my face. Not a nice way to get up... Today though, I can see the virtues of the shock treatment.
650am : STILL not getting up. This is the kid who is usually up on her own at 630am singing! 'Come on kiddo... You're late...' (Mummy getting desperate here...) This is when the monster appeared... 'But moo-oommm, I'm still tired. WHY do I have to go to school now? I WANT it to be a weekend NOW!' Mum, 'It's the weekend tomorrow, you can sleep in and catch up, now quick! Go clean up!' Monster (with the added finger on chalkboard screech thrown in for good measure), 'But I don't wanna sleep in on weekends... I wanna wake up early and go downstairs MYSELF!!' Rapidly losing patience mum, 'Look, I turn off the alarm on weekends, and if you wake too early, then of course I'll ask you to go back to sleep.' Monster, 'NNOOOO!!! I WANNA WAKE UP EARLY' Punctuated with a foot stamp. Really needing a pee mum, ' WHATEVER!!! I need the loo, GO CLEAN UP!!'
7am : Monster still yelling and screaming that she wants to wake up early tomorrow. Totally lost it mum, 'IF YOU'RE NOT DONE AND READY IN 5 MINS I'M COMING IN THERE AND DRAGGING YOU DOWNSTAIRS, AND YOU CAN GO TO SCHOOL IN YOUR PAJAMAS!!! AND IF THIS IS THE WAY YOU BEHAVE AFTER PLAYDATES, THEN NO MORE PLAYDATES!!!!' *cough, cough* I'm out of practice, we haven't had a visit by the monster in a while, obviously my vocal cords need re-conditioning...
705am : Stomping heard on the stairs and down the hall. Minimally effective because it's tiled, but I guess effort counts.
710am : 12mins late. The kiddo is slowly re-appearing. Very grumpy though. So I just left her to a silent breakfast in the car while I hid behind the daily paper. She didn't even want to have her daily chat with my Dad. Left him pretty disappointed too. 'I'll talk to you after school, grandpa...'
740am : 5mins late for school. Assembly already in progress. She was whisked off by her teacher, smiling and chatting. Back to normal... Sigh.
At a quick count, 1 monster = 1 yelling mummy, 1 disappointed grandpa, 2 staff literally hiding from both monster and mummy. Can you believe it, 1 bad tempered kid spoils the morning for 4 people...!
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