Halloween party

Kiddo and I attended our 1st ever Halloween party today. Costumes required for all attendees. Parents included. Being cheapo mummy, I decided to make my own. After all, why pay loads of money for something I would only ever wear once? My home made fairy costume cost about US$10 and 2 hours of time. It will now be cut down to kiddo size. Voila!! More money saved on costumes.

The morning was spent helping N carve pumpkins at her place. Great fun. The kids played all morning and then some, but that meant we were free to unleash our artistic abilities (google images is great!) without interruption (or not much anyway)... After multiple different knives and tools (some of which names I couldn't even tell you on pain of death) including a drill set, we had our 7 carved pumpkins. N was initially thinking 20, but just the 7 took us from 930am till 2pm to complete. With a short lunch break, of course. At that point, we realized 20 was clearly unmanageable. All in all, pretty proud of our efforts. No injuries either, bar a small nick on my left thumb that probably happened as I was trying to stab a hole with the knife angled towards myself. D'oh!! Still, it didn't bleed (or was pasted shut by pumpkin goo), hence forgettable in my books. Especially since I only just noticed it while hitting the space bar rather vigorously after the computer hung (AGAIN!!) as I was trying to upload photos...Photos taken by kiddo before any knives or drills were put to use.

The fruits of our labour. Far left is a cat. Middle small is hello kitty, on top of the medium beigy pumpkin on right is my version of a 'pocket God' pygmy (You really have gotta be playing iPhone games a lot to get this one)
All lit up. For some reason, the hello kitty candle kept blowing out. Oh well. No one could be bothered to keep relighting it...

After that, it was nap time for kiddo and mummy. Daddy is in Bali on some team building thing so no tag team parenting this weekend. Monster mummy's just begging to emerge. Safer if everyone gets lots of sleep. Then hopefully it'll just be growling instead of screaming and raving... I hope...
The dressed up mummies. That's me in the pink fairy outfit (with the cheapo skirt) in the middle...

By 530 we were dressed and tiara'd up. For the 1st time ever, I pulled out my green and blue eyeshadow. I was aiming for the whole glittery butterfly look, but to be honest, I couldn't see the difference between that and using my normal brown eyeshadow. That shows you how little skill I have for applying makeup. Later I found out that in order to make the colours more vibrant, I should have started with a layer of concealer. Too bad, I don't own any. Should have just gone for kiddo's face paints.

The party was a riot. Sat down and margaritas started magically appearing in front of us. The kids were wonderfully occupied by professional entertainers. And parents could eat and chat to their hearts content. Funny how all the men just ended up propping up the bar. We had a surfeit of vampires tonight. One of them was so artfully made up by his wife that his kids wouldn't go near him. Even after all the red lippie complete with faux dripping blood was wiped off. Hilarious. The girls, by and large, were princesses and fairies, with the boys generally superheros of some sort. Not very up to date on superheros I must admit, though I could probably recite the cast of pixie hollow given a chance.

Later, we had a modified trick or treat session. Parents brought tents and sat inside while the kiddies came around. I'm pretty certain I handed out stuff multiple times to the same kids, but who cares, it's not like we're going to eat the sweets. Kiddo doesn't like sweets (weird, but I'm certainly not complaining), so her stash will be carefully examined and subsequently redistributed to our staffs' kids.

I scooted off with kiddo at 9pm. 2 hours past her usual bedtime. She was still going strong. But if I waited till she was tired, no doubt fairy princess mummy would have morphed into evil fairy princess mummy. As it is, grumpy fairy princess mummy was definitely in charge, despite several margaritas (exactly how many I couldn't say, the barman was a fantastic topper-upper). Hopefully by tomorrow calm mummy will be back in charge...

New country, new hobbies

Some people have hobbies, some don't. Some people are collectors, some aren't. Some people are obsessive-compulsive, some laid back... I'm a compulsive hobby collector. And (not so) proud of it.

When I was growing up, I did the usual girlie crochet and knitting bit. That was about all. School and golf left very little time for anything else apart from story books in the car and while waiting around. Hmmm... that's probably how I developed the habit of always carrying a book or two in my bag wherever I go.

When I was working in London, knitting and crochet (and the books, of course) were portable. I could take them on the tube with me. They were great stress busters. Very soothing. Except the time when I completed a sweater and realized it was too small! Very annoying. I think I chucked it in the bin in a fit of pique. Anyway, we moved back to KL and had kiddo. She consumed all of my time for the 1st two years of her life (What can I say? Obsessive 1st time mom) until she started school, and there I was, at loose ends, with NO hobbies! Knitting in a tropical country is pretty pointless, and after the 5th doily, even crochet gets pretty dull. So I started taking beading classes. That went on for several years, pretty much everyone in the family got stuff thrown at them whether they liked it or not. Rosaries, necklaces, bracelets, whatever...

Then... Jakarta. The land of cheap materials. I carried on doing my beading initially, then a friend, BR, who paints the most gorgeous plates, introduced me to ceramic painting. Initially I was very resistant. After all, I was the kid my art teacher told never to give up my day job 'cause I would starve as an artist. But after some persuasion and lots of, 'It's ok to copy stuff you know.' I finally capitulated. Me being me, I bought every colour paint I could find. I had 2 different browns, 2 different greens, 2 different reds etc. That year, my parents got painted plates for Christmas.










Since then, I have added, to my hobby collection, scrapbooking and sewing. I still do the other stuff. But depending on mood, sometimes I feel like something completely different, so out come the sewing machine, or the beads, or the paints... The Man got so fed up with only having about 2 sq.ft. on a 2m long dining table for meals that he 'gave' me the dining table and bought a new one. It's now covered with 'works in progress'. Some I don't think I'll ever complete, but if it's in front of me, perhaps I can fool myself into thinking they'll get done at some point. The powers of self deception...

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My 'boredom busters'. Some of the things I've done over the last 2 years... (I just dragged and dropped the photos wherever. This whole uploading photos business stumps me...)

Here we go again

It coming up to the end of our 2 year lease on our Kemang house. We've been here officially for 2 years now. The search for a new place begins again...

Here in Jakarta, leases are signed for at least 2 years with payment in advance. That's the full 2 years rental upfront. No moolah, no house... Thank goodness for employers that pay first and then deduct monthly.

So, 2 years in a house. We've decided that our next place will be an apartment. The house is lovely, but the Kemang traffic is soul destroying. As Mr.D, my go-to guide is fond of saying, there will always be traffic jams in Jakarta. It's a fact of life. But Kemang traffic is not only unpredictable, but so bad that if you come out and there's no congestion, you feel a little suspicious that you're the only one missing some huge event.

Another thing about houses is the staffing issue. The staff have their separate quarters. That's just standard for Jakarta houses. In this current house, the staff area is downstairs, and I rarely go down. Occasionally I will pop my head down only to be greeted by strange male voices. Yikes. I freely admit I'm not the most courageous of people. When I worked in London, I was the only A+E doctor I know who ran away from a patient who's fist seemed to have an attraction for my face (ok, so he was drunk). Anyhow, strange men in my home freak me out. When I call the maid up, it's always 'my husband', 'my son', 'my other son' blah blah... Enough already! At least in an apartment you can tell security not to let anyone but the maid up. Big plus point.

The other thing we miss is the sense of community. This particular compound doesn't seem to have many kids at all. And they're either much older, or much younger than little miss. There's also a limit to the number of times I can wander over to AL's house. She hasn't started drawing the curtains when I walk up the driveway yet, but let's not risk it...

In a nutshell, my 'current' top 3 issues in apartment hunting : Security, community, staff problems.

Our lovely agent T took me round some houses today. Gorgeous in the typically overblown, lavishness of Jakarta houses. One was not too bad, 3 bedrooms, a large sitting room, large extra multipurpose room (craft room, of course), large open kitchen-dining room. Huge garden with lap pool. Only downside was only the master bedroom has an onsuite bathroom. Meaning kiddo would have to go through 2 doors to reach the bathroom at night. While bypassing the stairs AND the master bedroom door. A detour to either is NOT ok at 3am.

The next house was totally a show piece The agent told me with a grin that it is a good house to look at, but she didn't think I would be renting it. HUGE. 3 levels plus roof garden. Pool on a deck outside the living and master rooms. Downstairs wet kitchen connected to upstairs dining room (that has it's own dry kitchen!). Looked around for the little tinkling bell Victorian ladies used to summon 'cookie' but I guess in a house like that an intercom would be more the thing. Not to mention the entryway (which I thought was the living room except, ugh horrid electrical box on the wall!) and activity room that were both the size of my KL living room. Whew. One way glass windows all around... Something like 8 bathrooms. Every door that looked a little out of place was a bathroom. It's almost like the owner just shoved bathrooms in spaces so they wouldn't be empty. Under the stairs, between oddly aligned walls... Still, if kiddo were 10, I would seriously consider it. The rental was not that much higher than the apartment we looked at. And imagine, sunset, walking from the bedroom straight to the pool with a G+T in hand, billowing white kaftan... Sigh. The fantasy kinda sputters out there 'cause other houses and the contractors on the house opposite can see right onto the pool deck. So no white kaftan or G+Ts from the bedroom in any case. Oh well.

The quest shall continue...

The ongoing mozzie battle

Jakarta = mosquitoes. No escaping that undeniable fact. There are days I sit on my bed at night and point out all my bites to The Man. Usually he's reading his Triathlon magazine and isn't even listening... But so far, the record is 27 bites. Yup. I counted them all twice to make sure. Kiddo's record so far is 15. That was when we first arrived here. Hence our ongoing battle...

We've tried most remedies, including the esoteric ones you read about on the net. Some actually do work! But as I sit here scratching my fifth bite of the evening , I realize that my goal is actually to protect the kiddo. I've pretty much acknowledged that the mozzies have me beat. 'Sweet blood' the folks say. I'm probably the best mozzie repellent you could have. Put me anywhere within 5 feet of you and I guarantee none will bite you. They'll all come for me.

Anyway, getting back to anti-moz solutions. I've tried to include everything that worked for me. If anyone has anything else, please, PLEASE speak up. As they say in Defender Chronicles, 'We may have lost the battle, but we can STILL win the war!!' (Yes, I agree, I'm somewhat obsessed with that game)

Checking the house for stagnant water
When we first moved here, we used to get attacked by swarms of mosquitoes. Nothing we did worked. Nothing. I looked over the whole house, but there were no empty flower pots or buckets. I was stumped. Then came the water leak into the service area. It was eventually traced to the air well that we weren't using. When they scooped up the pretty, white, decorative stones, I saw 6 inches of soaking wet mud. Yes, MUD! Cue swarms of mozzies headed straight for me. Well, Madam legged it straight for the car yelling, 'Tak mau batu!! Buang semua batu dalam rumah!! Lumpur juga!!' (Don't want stones! Throw away all the stones in the house! Mud too!) For sure they thought I had lost it, but hey, no way was I sticking around to see if the mozzies would pick me over the work men... Well, no more swarms after that, just insidious sneak attacks mixed in with some lightning strikes.

Electrified mosquito bats
This is sanctioned violence at it's best. The bats are rechargeable, and when you hit an insect it gives this really satisfying pffffsszzzttt sound accompanied by a mini explosion (the more blood sucked, the bigger the explosion). Hah! Die you bloodsucking spawn of evil, die!!! In Hubby's hands though, it's a weapon to rival a light saber. Witness the lunging and swiping as he attacks the little blighters... mosquitos, flies, whatever... bring 'em on. Then he bounces (flies usually) them on the bat a few times... pfffzzt, pffzt, fzttt, zzt... spark, spark, spark. And looks up with this beatific smile. 'I got one, Babes' Huh. I'd be cowering under the table by then... People, word of warning, it bloody HURTS to get hit by one of those things!!! I DON'T CARE if it's an accident!!!

Mosquito repellent
For kiddo we use Zwitsal, which contains citronella. DEET free. Slather it on many, many times a day and usually there won't be many bites. But you have to keep up with it. Advantage is it soothes the already existing bites too. For us adults, we used to use Off. But it contains DEET. Jungle formula, if you can get it, is great. There are various roll on formulations. Generally they're quite effective if you remember to keep applying. I didn't like the idea of having kiddo slathered in chemicals all day, so the search went on for something else.

Mozzie patches and bands
Right now, this is our method of choice. I stick a MozzOut patch on her uniform before school and it keeps her bite free there. Although the patch supposedly stays effective for 8 hours, I've found that a new one after school will take her through to bedtime. So I reckon 5-6 hours max. They cost about Rp50,000 for 24. Available at Dharmawangsa Square. The band I bought at Mothercare also seems pretty good. It's bright pink, so kiddo's more than happy to wear it. Around her wrist, or ankle, or dangling from some toy... Smells really strong though (not unpleasant, just eye wateringly strong). I'm pretty sensitive to smells, and it was just too strong for me.

Sound wave pest repellents
In KL, there are these little gadgets for sale, apparently they emit a sound wave that humans can't hear, but that disrupt the nervous system of pests. Including rats! Well, we have them everywhere. It seemed to work really well in KL, but I'm less convinced it's actually beneficial here. No real difference to my spot count with and without. Ditto for the key chain version that you can hang on yourself when you go outdoors. We do it anyway, just in case, but even when I forget, there aren't any more or less bites on the kid.

Mosquito nets
There is no doubt these work. You can get beautiful drapy ones that hang from the ceiling and make your bed look all princessey, but beware the dust trapping, mozzie trapping, and tripping that can happen. Also if it doesn't hang well, the mozzies can get in anyway. Totally not an option for dust sensitive, asthmatic kiddo. Until we found the Javan bed canopy... This is the ultimate!! A tent-like mozzie net that folds into a circle (yay for holidays!) and springs out like a tent (yay, no folds to trap anything!). It sits snug on top of the bed (single, queen AND king sizes), is accessed by zippered openings on each side and has the added advantage of stopping a restless sleeper from hitting the floor. Although I'm sure if you rolled fully against the side, the floor would be the final destination anyway, though perhaps a prolonged sinking rather than a crash. Initially we had some toilet emergencies while kiddo got used to the whole zipper system, but we seem to be over that. So now I might only occasionally hear the zipper through the monitor as she's goes about her way in the middle of the night.

Light bug traps
Another fantastic invention. Varying sizes. Usually a uv light followed by a fan underneath and a bug reservoir. They're great. You can get super big ones, or cutesy animal ones like kiddo has in her bedroom. Doubles as a night light too. We empty them out periodically, and although I would say kiddo has the most mozzie free room in the house, we still get at least a dozen or so in there at every check.


Plug in chemical emitters
These are the ones where you plug the liquid canister into the wall or use the hot plate and chemical mat. Kiddo is sensitive to the liquid ones. They were effective, but she kept wheezing. So no go. She's ok with the vape mat, so that's also on in her room every night.




Blocking doorways
I really have no idea if the mozzies fly under the door to kiddo's room. Perhaps I give them too much credit for strategy and planning. But just in case, I sewed up a long tube, filled it with prefrozen green beans and plugged the bottom of the door. At least it keeps the air conditioning in...




Outdoor burners
You can get lovely burners and torches for citronella oil in most stores here. They look great, smell great too. But I don't think they work. I don't like smelling of smoke, so perhaps I'm just not near enough. Mozzie coils work well, but beware the feet. Accidentally brushing against one is funny only to your mates as they watch your frenzied leaping about.

Dishwashing liquid
I got an email from my mom. There was this article floating around saying that if you put lemon (only lemon, not lime or anything else) dishwashing liquid in some water in a WHITE dish, all the bugs would fly in. I did it. Bugs of all sorts did go in. Can't say it changed my life any though. Apart from having to avoid dishes of water in the room. If you do this, be prepared for very strange looks from your staff. Trying to explain it to my maid didn't work very well. Could be perhaps because she already thinks I don't play with a full deck.

Listerin spray
Another email gem. Dilute original (original 'cause the other flavours apparently leave a sticky residue) flavour listerin half and half in a spray bottle and spray around all entryways and where you're sitting. All I can say is if it's a hot day, the evaporation of the Listerin pretty much guarantees all living organisms in the vicinity end up rather dopey. Humans included! I ended up feeling like I'd had a couple of glasses of wine (I was VERY liberal with the spray). Maybe I was bitten, maybe not... Dunno. Hee... Couldn't even see straight... Suppose it could be effective in the open where the fumes are less likely to overpower you.

So far, that's all I've tried. Since I suppose you can't really avoid all bites, I have tubes of Eurax (see photo above), the most effective anti-itch cream around, all over the house. At last resort, there is also the pool. Our water supply comes from underground, and maybe it's the minerals, maybe the temperature (it's usually freezing even at noon), maybe both, but it works wonders at reducing the redness and swelling of bites.

Again, if anyone has any other methods of mosquito prevention, PLEASE TELL ME!!! I'll happily try (almost) anything...

Beat the traffic blues

I hate car journeys. I absolutely detest being stuck in the car for any longer than 30mins max. It's worse when I have to listen to the kid fidgeting and moaning. Endless 'are we there yet' and 'how many minutes more'. Grrr... We'll get there when we get there!!! For self preservation, I now do the following...

1. Have a decent sized bin in the car. Or at least one that fits the kid's bum. No matter how conscientious she is about peeing before we go out, Jakarta traffic means that sometimes, we get caught out. A friend uses left over diapers, gets the kids to go into the back row to pee in them. But it doesn't solve the occasional poop problem. 'Nuff said... Adults, you're on your own...
2. Teach the kids to have meals in the car. Was totally against the whole eating in the car business till we moved here. Now she's up at 630am, in the car and breakfasting at 7am. Pick her up at 1pm, and she finishes lunch in the car. It takes over an hour to get home, so if we wait, it's past 2pm by the time she eats.
3. Have wet wipes, hand sanitisers, tissues, spare newspapers, spare bin bags. This is really to facilitate the above.
4. Have small bottles of drinking water in the car. Even if you're not thirsty when you start your journey, after 3 hours of being stuck in the car, even the most stoic of passengers will be in need of a little something. The snack issue I leave to your own discretion. Food in the car sometimes means uninvited passengers like cockroaches...
5. Pack a bag of books before you go out. We've worked out that rainbow fairy books last about 45mins. So a minimum of 3 of those if we're going down the road for dinner. You never know. Traffic jams here can appear out of the blue for no reason known to man.
6. Pack a pillow. At the very least you can hide your head under it if the whining gets too unbearable. No, no... don't smother the kid/ husband, they're really not (I hope) trying to be difficult...
7. It's an advantage if you have a third row and/ or seats that recline. Believe me, no matter how much you adore your hubby, after 3 hours (or 3mins if he's particularly fractious that day) of sitting next to a fidgeting, complaining, overgrown kid, you would pay ANYTHING to have a back row. You're never too old for time out.
8. Some people swear by portable DVD's. For us it's the iPhones (GO APPLE!!!). With daddy in the car too, it's 2 iPhones. Someone has to do without, but it's never the kid. Her whining is worse than fingernails on chalkboard. We're waiting with baited breath for the Apple tablet thingey. Ooo... Defender chronicles on an A4 sized screen...
9. Books for adults too. I'm generally pretty prone to motion sickness, even the kiddy rides in the amusement parks can make me green. But traffic being what it is, sometimes I can get through 2 full length novels a day.
10. Remind yourself that despite the traffic, there are other fabulous things you get for living in Jakarta... maid(s), driver, cheap craft stuff, good food, nice house, good friends, endless malls... If all that fails, get out and take an Ojek. (Just KIDDING!! Unless you're a good deal braver than I am)

You know you've been in Jakarta too long when...

The following list is what I've noticed in no particular order...

1. You forget how to open and close doors.
2. You forget that going down to the corner shop shouldn't take 30mins.
3. You forget that you can actually walk 10m to the shop next door and not take the car.
4. You stop feeling self conscious at being greeted by rows of bowing sales people if you are the 1st person in a shop that morning.
5. You start to believe that traffic lights are advisory and not mandatory.
6. People saying 'tergantung' (depends) doesn't make your blood boil anymore.
7. You don't notice when people drop 'kok' into their sentences.
8. You don't lurch around the back seat in alarm anymore when you see oncoming traffic in your lane or people driving on the kerbs.
9. You think tipping more than Rp10,000 (USD1) for anything is a rip off.
10. You automatically assume everyone is nice and smiley, and feel very miffed if someone isn't.
11. You fantasize about playing a round of golf without once touching your golf ball (that came from The Man. Obviously)
12. You forget that there is a boot attached to the back of your car. Or that you need to load or unload it. Shopping magically disappears into it...
13. Your kid forgets what clean up means.
14. You feel a twinge of nervousness every time the maid goes off. Then another twinge on Sunday night thinking she may not come back.
15. You're the go to person whenever someone wants to buy anything esoteric.
16. You've run out of shopping centres to while away the school hours.
17. You now have a 'face' you have to put on every morning (moisturizer alone doesn't count)
18. You forget that you have house keys.
19. You go on holiday and are horrified when offered tap water to drink.
20. The signals and horn on your car are to be used as frequently as the brakes.
21. It no longer surprises you to see 1 kid, 1 nanny, 1 driver, 1 car families.
22. Bali as a holiday destination no longer excites you.
23. You stop being able to live without your (social not work) Blackberry.
24. You get used to reconnecting your internet 5 times an hour.
25. When you order something and are given a delivery date, you automatically add at least a week (a month for furniture) to it and are amazed if it is completed earlier.
26. You take for granted that trips to the immigration office take only 15mins.
27. You start to carry wet wipes in your travel cases not for kiddo, but to wipe off the chalk marks on your suitcases that customs put on to indicate a further check is warranted.
28. Your kid sings Bahasa songs as adeptly as standard nursery rhymes. Understanding is a different matter though.
29. You get used to schools having indoor tennis courts, swimming pools, multiple football fields, indoor basketball courts, multilevel auditoriums.
30. You realize that after writing the above list of 30 things, that it's just the tip of the iceberg, but are too tired to write anymore...

I *heart* my phones

All my adult life, I've been the proud bearer of whatever free or cheap phone came with my mobile subscription in London. Nothing fancy, not too many fancy geegaws if you please. Just phone and texting. Maybe the odd game thrown in for boredom busting during those long tube/ train journeys. Phones were for communication, little else. Then, we moved back to KL, and for whatever reason, I upgraded. Then again. And again. Finally ending up with the Samsung dual chip (1 chip for KL, 1 for Jakarta). I was honestly quite happy at that point. The Man had a blackberry (work), iPhone (social, but I was the only one who had the number!), and Palm Treo (KL). So mine were for communication, and his iPhone for the occasional games. Everyone happy right? So you would think.

2 years on. I now carry a blackberry AND an iPhone (Hubby's discard. He now has the new iPhone 3Gs or some such alphabet combo). Here in Jakarta, most folks go, 'Ya? What's your berry pin?' In KL, (usually from my parent's) the reaction goes something like that, '2 phones?? What for? You can only use 1 at a time! Not like earrings where you hang 1 on each ear!' (Last bit from my dad who carries an obsolete Nokia and gets furious if you change his ring tone 'cause he doesn't know how to change it back) Others say I should be in one camp or the other. Berry or iPhone, and never the twain shall meet. Well, the twain are meeting very well in our little family. Both daddy and mommy have Berrys and iPhones. In fact, I adore both my phones.

Initially, before I got my berry. Hubs and I had a little discussion weighing up the pros and cons of it. Seriously, why on earth would I need a Blackberry. Well, here in Jakarta, you can have unlimited data services using several of the prepaid providers. Mine is Telkomsel Simpati and I pay Rp180,000 (about USD18) for a month. In KL, I had to activate berry services on my Maxis postpaid line, and for unlimited data, it was well over RM100 (about USD30+) a month. Still, compared with about Rp60,000/month for only phone services, it was 3x the price... The unit itself cost Rp4.7mil (about USD 470) though, so not really more than my previous Samsung. So this is what we came up with in that little discussion: (assuming the package is unlimited)
1. Messaging between berry users is free
2. Messaging photos between berry users is free. Great for sending daddy photos of the stuff kiddo gets up to during the day. Sometimes I don't have my camera with me, but my phone, always.
3. Unlimited surfing all the time. Think 3 hour traffic jams and you begin to see how it might be a clincher in this discussion.
4. Most of my friends are on it. Makes it much easier to communicate. Especially since there is a status option that lets you post short messages. Saves the overseas roaming charges if your friends know not to call you when you're out of town.
5. My email goes straight there. No more missing important bank stuff because I couldn't be bothered to check my email.
6. Connection problem happen only rarely. So no cursing at the computer for disconnecting out of the blue.
7. Better relationships with family/ friends who live in other parts of the world who also carry berrys.

Ok, so there you go. I got me a berry... Now for the iPhone. Yes, yes, you're rolling your eyes. Still, I need something to stick my KL chip in, and since Hubby was upgrading to his iPhone alphabet soup, I might as well take his old iPhone right? See... Logic at it's best. Anyway, I love my iPhone too! Loads of fun applications to download from iTunes stores. Some free, some a couple of bucks. Lots of stuff for kids. I just downloaded a math program for kiddo that does addition and subtraction (Kidcalc). So what if I have to sit through endless kiddy voices saying, 'Twelve. Pumpkins. Minus. Three. Pumpkins. Equals. Nine. Pumpkins'...Kiddo likes it. And since math is really not her strongest subject, I guess it's good she's playing and learning at the same time.

As for me. I have my Defender Chronicles and Fieldrunners. 2 tower defense games that are so addictive it's not true. Think 2am fixed, bloodshot, stare at the little iPhone screen waiting to see if your 15th strategy of the night will keep the little scurrying enemies from reaching your home. Initially I would stare at them so hard that my lids would stick together if I tried to blink. Ugh. Let's not go there... Then there is the hypnotic game Enigmo, where you have to make all these little droplets of water bounce into a pot. And to cap it off, the puzzle game where you have to make a ladybird push boxes across the screen and avoid getting squashed by spiky balls (Ynth). Ooo... not to mention the penguin game where you crash penguins into polar bears (crazy penguin catapult) or the one where you have to milk your cows before they explode (milk panic)...

It's amusing at times when Hubby and I have to gather up all our phones and juggle them with other bits of paraphernalia just moving from one part of the house to another, but that's a tiny price to pay for the sheer enjoyment we get out of our phones...

How to teach your kid to speak Mandarin

Want to teach your kid to speak Mandarin? Don't bother with lessons and fancy books. Just carry on long involved conversations with cab drivers and wait staff in Mandarin and refuse to tell the kid what you're talking about. Before you can even say 'Ni Hou' they'll suddenly start saying phrases that you previously had to gouge out of them with threats of bodily harm... Passive aggressive mom, 1; stubborn kid, 0.

Panti Asuhan Pondok Taruna orphanage

Today was my first visit to the Pondok Taruna orphanage. This orphanage is one supported by our church and since it was practically next to Kiddo's school, I though I'd join a bunch of other ladies and go have a wander round.

The house is set in the middle of a kampung. And before you think 'little backwater hamlet', let me just tell you the difference between an Indonesian kampung and a Malaysian kampung. 1st of all, a kampung in Malaysia is usually quite rural. Not many amenities, slow pace of life. Indonesian kampungs are vastly different. According to Mr.D, my walking encyclopedia of all things Indonesian, because Jakarta is essentially pockets of affluence within many kampungs, the kampungs themselves function like towns abutting towns. Think Yong Peng (a town in Johor State) 30 years ago. This little kampung had it's own internet cafe, and streets lined with restaurants. The biggest difference, though, was the greenery. Indonesian kampungs are filled with greenery. And the inescapable traffic...

To get to the orphanage, you have to drive down this tiny lane that barely fits the width of a car (we missed it a few times thinking it was the back door into someone's house). It then opens out into the orphanage that has a few joined buildings, and even it's own school. They have some donated computers, but no instructor. A stocked library but no supervisor. The kids cannot be left unsupervised at the library because they will attempt to sell off the contents to the seconds collector for extra pocket money! There are 170 kids under the direct supervision of the extremely capable Ibu L and her 17 staff (some are ex residents, all work for room and board only). She was previously supervising 5 other orphanages but got tired, so is now matron for this one only. However... she is also starting another orphanage in Lampung, as well as rescuing kids from all over Indonesia. Whew! At present, her husband is part of the relief work at Padang.

Looking around, the kids are all clean and polite. They're cheerful and happily pick up the younger ones that one can see running about. Everyone has their duties, be it kitchen, cooking, laundry, cleaning etc. I was there for almost 4 hours and never heard any scolding or crying. Everyone calls Ibu L 'Ma' and there was always a kind touch or word for passing kids. What a lovely lady. I admit to being a touch alarmed on spotting the barbed wire wrapped around the balcony railings, but Ibu L explained that it was the only way to stop the boys from climbing up to the roof for some kite flying. Apparently, all that prancing on the roof was causing water to seep into the bedrooms... Boys will be boys she said. For the same reason, she couldn't manage to grow plants, as the kids would pull on them if they were trailing, or pick at them if they were ground level.

Ibu L, trying to generate a little income for the home, often personally carries little crafty items from all over to sell at the orphanage. Lovely little carved eggs with cinnamon attached that smell heavenly, Dayak beaded purses etc. No marketing is done though, so her customers tend to be the local village people. Minimal profits as you can imagine. Well, my eyes practically popped out, and since my coming bazaars are in aid of the orphanage anyway, she was more than happy for me to take some stock to sell. Ooo... Very tempted...

Just some interesting facts that I have no where to insert... They get through 70kgs of rice (Not kidding!!) and 10kgs of vegetables (if available) PER DAY!! Often they can't get that amount of veg so go without. Meals are rice, or fried instant noodles 3 times a day with a little tempe (locally made fermented soy beans). Meat is a luxury. Once a while, they will kill a dog (desperate, ok...). That's really got to me 'cause they had a bunch of very nice looking pups in cages. According to Ibu L, they will keep the good guards, and sell or eat the fat ones. Dog meat is apparently very pricey in the market. Rp25,000 (USD2.50) for a whole chicken, but up to Rp40,000 (USD4) per kg of dog meat. I tried really, really hard not to be influenced by my own opinions while thinking about this issue, but I'm afraid I can't get away from thinking of dogs as pets and not livestock. Ugh.

I will leave you with that lovely conundrum and go off to catalog the goodies that Ibu L sent with me instead... Let me know if anyone is interested!!

What you really, REALLY need to know when you see a doctor

I was thinking back to our little trip to the doctor's for kiddo's vaccinations last week. First thing he asked me was, 'Where are her old records?' Oops. Um. In KL. And a copy with the school. But honest, guv, I can tell you what she had... Well, Doctor L was not impressed. He didn't tell me off but the ole brainbox was probably muttering something about mothers knowing better... So I came home and had a little think about it. I put myself (figuratively!! No dress up for me, please) back in my white coat (not that we really wore one that much... white coats and ties have been shown to be the largest germ collectors around) and stethoscope and thought about the information I always wanted my patients to have when they came in the room. Trust me, 'Isn't it in the records?' is NOT an answer.

First off, for kids, especially families moving all over the world, is a copy of the vaccination records. Try and stick to one place for jabs in any one country. And at the very least, have a list of all the vaccinations given. I have a friend who's kid has had vaccinations in about 5 different countries, and now at the age of 5, poor mummy can't remember what was given last year in the US. This record is pretty important because different countries have different vaccination schedules. So if you say, '5yr old jabs, Doctor' to someone working in a country with no 5 yr old jabs, but with 4 and 6yr old jabs, then good luck.

Next is a list of current medications and current illnesses. Saying, 'I've got arthritis and I take this little beigy pill' is not helpful in any way at all. Seriously, how many beigy pills do you think are out there? Answer, too many that fit your description. And all doing different things. It's a bit of work, but one of my ex-patients who got fed up of doctors giving her exasperated looks did the following. x illness - a, b, c drugs; y illness - d, e, f drugs. Amazingly helpful. She also put a list of drugs that didn't work on the list next to each condition. Made life so much easier... Crucial for kids with recurrent illnesses like asthma. It's useful to know what the kid needs under what circumstance. And how much. Big difference between puffing once a week and 3 times a day...

That brings us to the medical profession's favourite (not) question, 'any illnesses that run in the family?' At this point, we're cringing, waiting for the deluge of information about granduncle so and so's wife's cousin's daughter's blah blah. If your doctor's eyes are glazing over, you've gone too far. We need only blood family, folks. So NOT your spouse or their family, ok (unless you're bringing your kid to the paed, then your spouse's family history is relevant). Spousal issues are covered somewhere else. We need, succintly please, illnesses that seem to affect more than one generation. Or if there are 2 or more of the same condition within the extended family. Of note, you have to inform your doctor about cancers and genetic illnesses. It's useful to know what grandparents have passed from, and of course, any illnesses that your parents have. Doctors will usually ask about heart disease and cancers. But it's useful knowing about allergic symptoms that run in the family, e.g. asthma, excema etc. And some families do tend to have odd ailments running about. Trust me, I would know, our family has an odd nerve condition that only 1 neurologist in KL (ours) knows about. And that's because she had to go research this weird condition that initially affected both my dad and aunt. So when I went to see her with a bit of the same, her reply was, 'Oh yes... you have xyz (I certainly never studied it in med school!!). I can stick this ginormous needle into your arm and give you a confirmation. No?? Go read up the website then, you're ok for now.' Huh... Thanks, Doc.

Finally, my personal fav, 'Do you have any allergies?' The number of suddenly dumbstruck faces I've seen is mind boggling. 'Um, my mom said...' 'My mom is...' (No mate, you. Not your mom) 'Um. Wait while I call my mom' 'My mom never told me...' 'Let me ask my wife...' (your wife?!?) 'I, think, perhaps...' If you have never had a reaction and your mom has never said anything to you. It's reasonable to say, 'Not that I know off.' See... effortless. And if you have had a reaction, please remember what kind. E.g. If you swelled up and couldn't breathe, that's likely an allergy. Diarrhoea is not an allergy to an antibiotic, but if the last time you were given it you had explosive ejections (from anywhere!) for a week and felt like a dog, then it probably would be better to try another drug. Contrary to popular belief, doctors are not sadists and generally try to avoid the 'killing is better than the cure' scenario.

Well, I hope that was amusing and vaguely helpful. As for me, I'm going to take myself off and prepare to approach the school tomorrow for a copy of the copy of Kiddo's vaccination records...

Drama over the weekend

Daddy is home!! A whole day early. He actually got in yesterday morning. Early enough for us to go to church and for him to go for a massage. The flight was apparently uneventful, except they lost his bike case containing his brand new, custom fitted, practically rides itself bike! Not to mention the little princess' leapster unit that she has been waiting months for. Disaster! There was a lot of calling around to no avail till we managed to get the number of a friend of a friend who is really senior in SIA Indonesia. Following that, The Man started receiving updates every time a SIA plane landed, right up till the last plane came in. Don't ask me what time that was, I was already dopey half asleep. Nothing, nothing, nothing.... Till this morning when the case was delivered to our house. And I wondered why they hadn't just chucked the dratted thing into the ocean. It's HUGE!!! According to Ibu I our maid, it took 2 people to unload! How embarrassing. And he wants to tote it around for triathlons... All I can say is, there's my shopping weight gone... Anyway, thanks N!

We also picked up the 4 shoe boxes that our family is filling for a couple of orphanages supported by our church. The instructions are Rp100k-150k (USD10-15) per box. Now anywhere else in the world and you'd probably think that would mean some stationary, sweets, that's it. But so far, I've managed to put in pencils, erasers, color pencils, markers, highlighters, exercise books, toothbrushes, toothpaste, lollipops, fluorescent stars, Koko krunch, coloring books and a cartoon instruction book (both courtesy of Office 2000 in Kemang). And I still have 100k to spare. Going to see how much more that can buy...

No school today...

It was Teacher's Day yesterday, and the school gave everyone a day off today. I went to bed last night with a certain sense of trepidation. What to do all day with the kid? She had her booster jab yesterday so I thought, perhaps nothing overly strenuous...

She woke at 715am. Ugh. I was really hoping for more of a lie in. Channeling evil mummy (twice in 2 days!!), I decided to leave her be. There was singing and story telling and goodness knows what else, but the guilt kicked in at 745am and I went in. Happily she was still involved in whatever story she had made up using her stuffed toys and wasn't bothered at all that mummy had been too lazy to go get her.

Then followed breakfast, reading, boochie ball, reading, country story, farmville, cafe world. Time check 1030am. Sigh. We went over to my friend (and neighbour) AL's house and spent an hour playing with her almost a year old Liverpool footie player in the making. He certainly moves as quickly as one! After all that, it was still only 1130am. Mummy, exhausted. Kiddo, still on full battery.

Lunch at Fj's on Jalan Kemang Raya (opposite Moms and I) was a lovely little girlie outing for us. Admittedly we stood out among the ladies (and gents) who lunched, but who cares. Kiddo had food packed from home, as she has had for the last 4.5 years whenever we eat somewhere not Japanese or Chinese. Mummy had the most fabulous 'mixed coloured pepper (actually, red, yellow and orange only) and prawn pasta'. A large deviation from my usual 'chicken and mushroom in cream sauce'. Note to self... keep working through the menu!!

We then dropped by my friendly tailor to pick up more breast feeding covers for the Christmas bazaars. As usual, delays. Not surprised. Would have been more surprised if he had actually handed them to me straight off. No matter, I usually build in a good 2 weeks extra for things like that. Not that I'll ever tell him. He's been in the process of making a blouse for me for over 6 months now. Here's hoping he still remembers what I want.

At this point, mummy's battery indicator was flashing red, and kiddo, predictably, was reading in the car. So, seeing as we had joined the usual Friday afternoon 'macet' (traffic jam), I decided to nap. Yay for books! Eventually the 500m 2min journey ended up over a km (diversions etc) and more than 30mins.

The rest of the day was just more of the same. Except kiddo did it all on her own 'cause mummy carried on napping after we got home! Kiddo eventually woke me at 4pm, 'Um, mummy, is it 4? Can I watch Diego?' Oops...

We did manage to speak, via skype, to my mom and grandma, followed by Uncle SH from Perth. So nice to catch up. Grandma has gone from Singapore to stay with my mom in KL and has apparently developed an addiction for televised tennis. She stopped watching the Shanghai Open for only a few minutes to say hi, then it was back to the telly. It's baffling since she has never EVER shown the slightly interest in sports of any kind... Maybe she and kiddo can play together. Probably the same standard... Speaking to Uncle SH is always interesting. He and Auntie YM are going to do the 'snow goose project' as she calls it and go live in New Zealand for the next 3 years, then the US I think. Not sure if there's some European bit thrown in too. Hats off... Anyway, he was saying that he watched some gardening show and learnt how to make the most effective anti bug mixture that was totally chemical free. Crush garlic into a jar of normal cooking oil and leave for a few days, strain and mix into water using a 1 (oil mix) : 20 (water) proportion. Spray liberally. He feels it's more effective than commercial pesticides and only smells a little if you go very near. I'd try it if I had plants...

All in all. We had a very nice day. Next time I'll make it a point to sleep extra early if the kid's got an extra day off. In retrospect, off days are more tiring than school days...

Never trust dosages on the sides of bottles...

Kiddo had her booster DPT today. Much, much less traumatic than expected. Maybe it was the ice pack before that numbed the area, or maybe it was the nurse yelling, 'abracadabra, sim salavim!' right in her face. Whatever it was, it worked. No crying at all!! Just a rather bemused look on her face. What I call the 'is it worth bursting into tears' look. All in all it was ok until about 5pm, right after her Dora show (fancy that!), when she started to complain of an ouchie arm. Then came a bit of drama during the attempt to remove the plaster. Lots of cringing and shuddering and groans and whimpers. Following which mummy got fed up and ripped the half hanging plaster off in one fell swoop. Heh heh heh... (evil mummy) She was NOT amused. 'Stop laughing at me!!! It's NOT funny!!!' In any case, I decided to give her a dose of paracetamol before things got worse. On picking up the bottle, I saw printed on the side : 4-6yrs 1.5 teaspoons (1 teaspoon is about 5mls but NOT ACCURATE! Dosing spoons are infinitely safer), 160mg/5 ml, not more than 5 times a day.

Ok, at this point, all I could think was, 'please tell me I've checked the dosage in the past...' because for my kiddo, that would be an overdose. And as one of my consultants once said, 'Paracetamol should be a controlled drug. It's the easiest and nastiest way to kill yourself. It poisons your liver and you die horribly...' I remember shipping patients off to liver units with everyone up in arms over the fact that a much needed liver would be going to someone who willfully destroyed their own. Anyway, that's an argument I definitely don't want to start...

Back to kiddo's paracetamol. The recommended paediatric dose is 10-15mg/kg (UK 10, Aus 15) up to 4 times a day. Australia then caps the dose at 60mg/kg/day. Being UK trained, I go by 10mg/kg. That would bring kiddo's dose to 160mg 4 times a day. Total = 640mg/day max. 960mg a day if you use the higher Australian recommendation. Using the dosage suggested on the bottle, she would be taking 240mg 5 times a day. Total = 1200mg. That's 87.5% more than what she should be having!! Which also works out 25% more than even the higher Australian recommended dosage!! Last year at age 4 she was 14kg. Going by the dosage on the side of the bottle, she would have received 114% of her recommended daily dose! I shudder to imagine how much paracetamol parents out there are unknowingly giving their children thinking the dosage on the bottle can be trusted. Yikes!

From now on, I'm checking the dose of every drug that comes into this house. No more assuming the dose printed on the bottle is correct. After all, you know what they say about assumptions... If you assume, you make an ASS out of U and ME... So before you dose your kid, just do a quick google check on the recommended dose for that particular drug. Much easier to check than to deal with the consequences of damaged internal organs. Oh... and buy a dosing spoon. Teaspoons and tablespoons are only good for eating, not administering medicines...

Day 7 :The Man is in New York

Got a call saying he's in New York. Followed by many messages asking if there really was nothing he could buy for me. Isn't he sweet...? Don't worry my dear, I'm doing all the buying I need right here. Heh heh heh...

By the way hun , yes, the maid can make goreng pisang and yes, it's very good.

The kiddo is due her shots tomorrow and I still can't find disney princess plasters. This is a disaster, because all she wanted was the ice pack and the princess (Ariel to be precise) plasters. Ugh. Will have to try and convince her that smiley faces will be just as effective at making her ouchie better...

To soap or not to soap, that is the question...

Soap, or to be precise, antibacterial soap. Advertised as being the solution to all our problems of household illnesses. But is it really the wonder product companies want us to believe it is? Today while I was standing in Hero supermarket perusing the half dozen brands of liquid handwash, I thought to myself, 'Do we really need all these chemicals inside the soaps to stay healthy?' So I decided to have a look around.

Many of the products contain Triclosan and Salicylic acid. Salicylic acid, ok, you make aspirin from it, and it's used on the skin to treat acne, so it's probably not that bad, unless you're going to try and chug the stuff. But Triclosan... Now that baby is a registered pesticide by the US EPA. Yup, PESTICIDE!!! It's a little like a bacterial bomb. Everything goes, friend or foe. Kaput. Now, I'm all for blitzing bad bacteria like salmonella, E.coli etc, but please, leave my normal skin flora alone. They actually protect you from colonization by other more harmful bugs. The other thing is that it's classified as a 'persistent pollutant'. Meaning it stays in the body as well as the environment. Studies have shown that virtually every creature on earth has some Triclosan in it. And humans, being the numero uno, top of the food chain consumers, are eating a little of it in EVERY MEAL!! Not to mention, washing it down the drain. Where it just gets stuck in the ground water waiting to get consumed and work it's way back up to us humans.

So, why am I making such a fuss about it? Well, Triclosan (also Triclocarban, the other product used) is postulated to cause cancer. Also if you're crazy enough to drink enough of it, then you could get lovely symptoms like convulsions, coma and death! Apparently, it also causes some skin irritation, but on the other hand, it affects your nerves temporarily so you can't feel it anyway. Of course, if you wanted to play devil's advocate, no one can actually produce evidence that proves 100% that it does all these nasty things so I will understand if you're not convinced.

The following points however, cinched it for me. By using so many antimicrobials (anti-bug stuff) on ourselves, we're actually encouraging resistant bugs. That's seriously bad especially if you get sick and nothing works. Also, studies have shown that if you wash your hands properly (10-15s rubbing all over with soap apparently), then there is no difference in illness (coughs, cold etc) rates between households that use antibacterial soaps and those that don't. Not forgetting the whole 'sterile house leading to increasing rates of childhood allergies' argument.

Suffice it to say, I opted for standard soap with as little on the ingredients list as I could get away with. Point of interest, I found Triclosan on the ingredients list for several leading brands of toothpaste. Except ones for sensitive teeth. Makes sense since it causes irritation. Wouldn't want THAT on a painful tooth!! Also on several antibacterial face washes, body washes. And this is just the beginning. Its been found in toys, cosmetics, shaving cream, kitchenware, blankets, humidifiers etc etc.

I just ransacked our supplies cupboard expecting to see Triclosan on everything. I admit to being a bug freak and buying everything with 'antibacterial' printed on it. Surprise, surprise... No Triclosan. But lots of 'antibacterial agent x%'. Hmmm... Doesn't inspire a lot of confidence does it... From now on, I shall endeavor to make this a phenol (group of chemical compounds that Triclosan and Triclocarban belong to) free household...

Nanny diaries

One thing I really had to get used to when we first got here to Jakarta was the '1 child 1 nanny' policy many of the families here subscribe to. I personally have nothing against nannies, in fact The Man and I do use a part time nanny on occasion when we feel like an evening out. The problem arises, though when families stop being able to function without their 'pengasuh', or when the kids actually prefer their nanny to their parents. Walking around the malls you will see dozens of uniform clad ladies. From what I can tell, their job is to feed, entertain, carry and supervise their charges. You will frequently see a poor beleaguered nanny chasing a kid around who has never been taught that meal times mean sitting in your chair till you're done! I have shivers every time we eat out, just anticipating a disaster where some waiter dumps hot food onto a kid. Whose fault will it be then? The waiter? The nanny? The kid? Surely not the parents...!?

A local friend of mine (an aberration who only uses her nanny to do the school run and when she's working) once said to me that nannies here try and foster the child's dependence on them. Their version of job security. If neither you nor your child can function without them, then you're never going to get rid of them are you. And it gets worse as the kid gets older. Witness the number of kids in restaurants still being spoon fed by their nannies. Yeesh. The way I see it, if a kid is old enough to use a PSP, he/ she is old enough to feed themself. According to another friend, she caught her nanny feeding the kid when she specifically asked her to let the kid do it himself. When confronted, the reply was, 'Dia tidak mau...' (He didn't want to). Ookaaayyy... who's the boss here? The other thing that really gets to me is the constant shoving of food down the gaping maws of chubby kids. Chicken or egg scenario... Are they chubby because food has been used as a pacifier, or do they eat like walking garbage disposals because they're already chubby and need more fuel? It really gets to me. PEOPLE!! No need to feed your kid out of meal times!! A snack occasionally is fine if you anticipate a late meal or if the kid has been very active, but there is no need to offer food every time the kid stops talking, or gets whiney, or gets tired, or gets bored, or simple behaves like kids do... Especially not with sweeties and chocolates anyway. All you end up doing is conditioning your kid to need and crave the sugar high. Not to mention the bad teeth. And the childhood obesity... If necessary, use fruit. I hesitate to even say kiddy biscuits because considering the volume I see consumed, just give them spoonfuls of sugar, why don't you...

When I dropped the kiddo off today, I saw some bigger (at least my height, so they would have had to be at least 10) kids who were accompanied by a companion. 2 kids in the back, 'companion' and driver in the front, who then rushed out of the car when it stopped to help unload the bags and stuff. OY! Do it yourselves!! The staff are NOT your slaves no matter how much money your parents have!! I overheard one parent agitatedly insisting that her nanny be allowed into the boys changing room during school hours to help her 7 yr old change into his swim trunks. Please spare me... That's just too much. Swim trunks!!! Not even the full body suits some of the other kids use. You mean to tell me he can't even put his briefs on himself?!? 7 and the nanny is still dressing him from the skin up?? School policy is NO ONE is allowed on the premises during school hours without a very good reason. That, is NOT one... I mean, bad enough that all the schools I've seen have special staff areas for nannies AND drivers to wait. Yes... Some families do the '1 nanny, 1 driver, 1 kid' thing too.

Ok. Enough ranting. Hubs and I just get really annoyed when we see kids running roughshod over their nannies while their parents just ignore everything going on. Nannies are well and good, there is definitely a place for them. But parents still need to be involved, right?! We did consider getting a nanny to do the school run (which takes me 3-4hrs everyday), but in the end, forget it. Sink or swim kiddo.. sink or swim...

PS I've found that for now, I actually quite enjoy the school run. If and when I get fed up of it, I think the marvelous Mr.D will be able to cope admirably on his own. Good man...

PPS Just to end with a little anecdote... A friend of a friend once took his 3 kids out together with the nanny to give his ill wife a little break. This chap was totally against the use of nanny uniforms, especially since they had little labels on the arm saying 'nanny' or 'governess' (not kidding! Not much governing goes on though...). He felt they were demeaning. Well, nanny dearest tried to pass the kids off as her own and daddy as her Bule (white) husband. Not realizing that 'mister' understood Bahasa quite well though never spoke it. You can guess what happened next... Poor recovering mummy was instructed to go out immediately to get a uniform (you can buy these in any store) for the upstart. On top of that, he wanted 'nanny' embroided onto the back too!

Day 5 : Hindsight is 20-20

I did something really, really idiotic today. Honestly, I know better than to bring up the issue of the dreaded vaccinations too much in advance, but I thought the kid would do better with some warning. After all, she doesn't like surprises. And it's only 4 days!! Well, more fool me. She started sobbing in the most heartbroken manner, kept going on and on about needing to have the ice pack and pretty plasters ready, not to mention the endless, 'I want daddy!!!! I want both of you to be there to cuddle meeee!!!' Come on. Please. He has NEVER been there for any of her jabs. Seriously, 'Can I have a half day off? My kid is having her jabs and I need to be there to cuddle her.' I can already imagine the looks. And to cap it off, in the middle of all the caterwauling, she suddenly declared, 'I wish it were already Thursday!' Huh? Come again? I thought you didn't want it!

We go through this whole vaccination melodrama every year. Last year it was the flu jab, this year the flu jab AND the regular scheduled boosters. Haven't even told her it's going to be 2! I can see how some moms might feel that it's not worth it, especially when you add the fears about risks of autism etc.

I remember back in medical school, we studied this concept called 'herd immunity'. In a nut shell, what it means is if you vaccinate enough kids, then the few who don't get vaccinated won't be able to catch the disease anyway. I guess if you're really convinced that your kid's 'herd' (this includes every single kid your kid is ever going to come in contact with) is fully immunised then it could be a valid argument for not giving your kid the jab. After all, there's been talk about a link between the vaccines and autism. Although I have yet to actually read anything that convinces me of a definite link. Circumstantial evidence, Your Honour...

When I weigh up the risks of death and permanent disability versus the risk of getting autism, which kids can get anyway, I tend to come down in favour of hauling her to the doctor when the guidelines say I should. This of course, is my opinion only, and I know parents who are vehemently against vaccinations of any sort. And that's up to them. Like I always say, you can but do the best you can for your kids, there will always be people who think they know better. And who won't be afraid of telling you either...

Amusing thoughts while husband is away on business...

Last night while lying in bed desperately trying to fall asleep after having, again, dropped off for a mini nap at 10, I considered the differences between having my beloved husband home vs. away on business...

Pros :

• Not getting woken up by his alarm at 530am on weekdays (work) and 430am on Sundays (running).
  
• Not having to restrict myself to 6 inches of bed to accommodate his sprawling. Mind you, we have a king sized bed, and before that, a queen. Regardless of the size of the bed, I always get only 6 inches. Never realized how big a king actually is until last night when I lay on my side and stretched my leg aallll the way over to his side and STILL couldn't reach the edge. I guess a 6 footer requires more space then a 5 foot 1-er...
  
• Not having to mediate between him and the kid when they wind each other up.
• Being able to hop off shopping at the weekends. Hubs HATES shopping, so we rarely go with him. And it's great fun shopping with kiddo. She's has the funniest observations. We were shopping for stuff to put in an orphanage gift box today and she suggested some flowers because, 'they're sooo pretty and it'll make the little girl feel better...'
• Being able to eat leftovers if I feel like it
• Not having to fight over the computer.
  

Cons :

• No one to talk to who doesn't occasionally whine like a steam engine with rusty breaks.
• Having to answer all the 'why' questions on my own without being able to say to daddy, 'tag you're it'.
• No one to talk to at the end of the day.
• No one to talk to in the middle of the day
• No one to show all my little crafty bits who will always say they're nice even if they suck. I always know anyway, he gets that deer caught in headlights look when he wants to say something's horrid but is afraid I'll get really upset by it.

I fell asleep at that point... Unfortunately, this periodic separation is part and parcel of the job. I miss my honey, but he loves his job and we get to enjoy lovely things because of it. So I just tell myself to enjoy that lovely big bed when he's away and (try, very, very hard) not to complain (too much) when he's around. After all, a couple of weeks every few months is small enough price to pay. And, tonight, I shall sleep in the MIDDLE of the bed...

Day 4 : Still husbandless

Off to church we went today. Kiddo loves Sunday school. Yay!! Our church is called the Jakarta International Christian Fellowship (JICF). It's housed on the 2nd floor of the Graha Niaga building right in the middle of the central business district. Good atmosphere, good speakers and they have a really good children's program. It took us ages to find it, but once we did, we knew we were staying. There's either a 8.30am or 10.45am service. For reasons of HIS running, we can only ever make the 10.45am service. Today they had children from YWAM (the Panti Asuhan Pondok Taruna orphanage) singing a few songs. JICF members contribute about 50% of the orphanages running costs and the kids come from all over Jakarta. A couple of them are actually at Uni. Inspiring to see that happen.

After church, we popped into the Penang Bistro near Senayan for lunch. This is the kid's favourite eating place because of the feather light roti canai. The other stuff is a welcome taste of home too. Prices, however are in line with the Jakarta culinary scene and a meal for 2 is very unlike to ever be under Rp150,000 (about USD15 / RM50). I can see my Malaysian friends sputtering already...! For that price, you do, however get air conditioning, mood lighting, drinks with fancy names and (so far), no flies. The last being a major bonus in my book! The Hainanese chicken rice is very tasty, but the chicken portions are tiny (in general chickens here are about as scrawny as you would ever see. Something about people not trusting fat chickens to not have had hormones injected. perhaps by serving skinny chickens they are indicating the quality?), probably a quarter of the size of a portion ordered at the Jalan Gasing chicken rice shop in KL. Just another thing to get used too... The laksa and curry noodles are certainly approaching KL standard. In fact, the prawns are about double in size as you would get in KL. I leave it to you to weigh up, less chicken vs larger prawns. Hmmm... The nasi lemak tastes really good too. But I've never eaten it like that in KL. Usually hubs picks some up after his run and it's wrapped in banana leaf with a hodge podge of stuff thrown on it. Here everything is nicely displayed and separated. Gotta give it to them, they know their food presentation.

Am just waiting now to see if 'some people' will write to them saying they're breaking copyright laws by using the word 'Penang'...

Day 3 daddyless : Kidzania mania...

Since kiddo and I were at loose ends today, we jumped at the chance to go to Kidzania with a friend and her kids. 2 moms, 5 kids (2 were my friend's nieces), a WHOLE lotta screaming.... Result : utterly exhausted moms with hyper kids.

Buying the tickets was an experience in itself. You queue like you're checking in at the airport. Trust me, it was as crowded and noisy as Soekarno-Hatta on a Friday. Then they give you a ticket that looks exactly like your Air Asia plane ticket, and a wrist band which is colour coded depending on whether you're with a party, an unaccompanied kid etc. There are 8 categories. More on that later. The band is used for logging them into various activities. Yes, parents get banded too... No, you can't participate no matter how much you beg. All the doors have 'no adults allowed' signs. I was rather disgruntled as being only 5'1", there were kids there much taller then I am...

Top : Kidzos , Mid : bank card, Bot :
drivers license, L/R : back and front
of tickets

On entering, you first come to Main Square, where the food is. Very wide selection but don't expect Cordon Bleu. With time pressing (5 hours is waaayyyy too little time), you just want something quick. The kids didn't eat much anyway. Probably had 15mins before they were off to the next thing. There's a 'Metropolitan Theatre of Kidzania' where the kids can stage a magic show or Peter Pan. Kids imitate the staff, so there's not much memory work needed. Best of all, a plaque displaying the 'Independance Declaration of Kidzania' sits in front of this huge monument to kiddy emancipation! One of the statues looks like it's casting off chains! I kid you not!! Someone PLEASE tell me I'm wrong...!

For kids, it's great. Wonderful atmosphere. No need to speak softly or tip toe around adults. For adults, it's P.A.I.N.F.U.L. Noise, noise and MORE noise. For someone who already has hinky ears, I couldn't hear nuts. Kiddo had to yank on my arm every time she had something to say. Every hour on the hour, they play the Kidzania theme song. Ouch. The kids can join a marching band, ouch. That's in addition to the welcome song and dance and the farewell song. Everything being played at MAXIMUM volume. Also sirens for the fire engine, ambulans, police (kids have to catch an escaped felon while being coordinated by other kids in the 'control room'. He has tattoo sleeves and breaks out of the prison that has rubber bars. Hilarious...) OUCH.

All the different activities are in their individual sound proof rooms. Each room takes 5-12 kids and lasts 10-30mins depending on what the activity is. You MAY NOT help your kid. Which is why I hope the KL version will be more English based than this one. The default language here is Bahasa, unless the majority of the kids need English, they will conduct it in Bahasa even though the other kids can speak English. You get payed in Kidzos ('local' currency. Upon starting you are given a 'cheque' you have to bank in. Kids either use the 'bank card' issued or withdraw Kidzos from the ATM to buy things) to do certain things like, wash windows, be a dentist/ scientist/ doctor/ tax agent (Huh??) or pay for services. Eg. getting your photo taken... Some activities have minimum ages, like being a tax agent (8. Huh x2??), some have minimum age suggestions, like being a scientist in the Yakult lab (6. Free Yakult included in the job...). Others are ok for all ages. Usually the food related activities (eg ice cream factory, cookie factore, Aqua plant etc) will give you a free sample of that item. Little tip from my Kidzania veteran friend, C : get your kids to do the pizza/ burger making activity and the Aqua bottling activity just before lunch. See! No need to pay extra for food!

The cutest thing there is the driving activity. You have to drive around, get fueled up at the pumps, go through a car wash (no water moms, don't worry). But in order to do that, the kids need, wait for it, a DRIVERS LICENSE!! To get this they need to get a medical check up (not real moms, don't worry), go through a driving lesson, and pay 20 Kidzos. Check out the photo above, it looks and feels real! With this, they can also do a go kart like racing activity. Kiddo was not interested in that, though looking at it, those go karts didn't seem all that go to me. More like, amble karts...

All in all, it was a fabulous outing. Moms had to crash at the Times book store cafe with some rejuvenating beverages for bit (actually so long the staff kept wandering by looking at us) while kiddos had some down time reading. As kiddo said at bedtime, 'I had an amazingly, fun time mummy. Let's go again!' For sure, apple of my eye. Let's just wait till mummy can hear again shall we...

Miscellaneous information

Tips from today's experience and C

1) For first timers, don't bother rushing to the bank when you arrive to get a bank card and cash your cheque. You can quite happily go around without it till later when it quieter.
2) Check the age/ height limit before q-ing. No point standing there for ages then getting told your kid is too short/ young.
3) If you have 2 parents, while one is waiting for the kids, the other can scout out an activity that is finishing. That way, less waiting for kiddos and they get to fit more in.
4) Head upstairs early. People tend to stay downstairs for a long time before going up. Early on the 'factories' upstairs tend to be quieter.
5) Get there early. You will need EVERY second of your time there.
6) Wear comfy shoes. Parents do A LOT of running around.
7) Don't bring a lot of extraneous stuff. There aren't many seats around for adults so by the time 5 hours is up, you may feel like your glamorous Prada has morphed into a deformed saddlebag. Next time I'm bringing a backpack and foldable chair...
8) Call ahead. If avoidable, you don't want to be squeezing with a whole bunch of school kids. My experience thus far is they don't really have a good grasp of the concept of a queue. Also there are no roped off areas to form the q, so unless your kid is good at standing up for themself (mine isn't), they can get totally shoved to one side.

Toilets

Clean and easily used by unaccompanied kids. Kiddo is about 105cm (what can I say, pint sized like mummy), and had no problems going on her own. Even the sinks had 2 levels. Low and super low. Best of all, the sinks are outside, so if you're a hand washing freak like me, you can personally supervise the soaping (provided) and scrubbing.

Security

Everyone is tagged in one of 8 colours. Once the kids are in, they cannot leave the premises unaccompanied. Dropped kids are picked up by their guardians at a designated place and the adult has to bring some proof of identity. When we were leaving, the security personnel were going around asking blue tagged kids if they had call their pick ups etc. The are also constantly on walkie talkies at the exit relaying information on how many blue tagged kids were still inside. Really impressive. I don't now how fool proof the system is though. C's nieces came later and were blue tagged, and yet were allowed to leave with us when we said they were part of our group.

From R : Party; responsible
adult for the party; School
group; Responsible
adult for the school; Accompanied
kid/ Adult (that's us); toddlers
aged 2-3yrs; Unaccompanied kids;
Babies/ Adults >65

Location, price and timing

Pacific Place 6th floor.
021-5154 222 / 021-5154 888 ext 101, 191, 192
www.kidzania.co.id

Mon-Thurs : 0900-1600 (7hrs) - 2-3yrs Rp5ok, 4-16yrs Rp130k, +16yrs (that's us, moms) Rp90k
1100-1600 (5hrs) - 50k / 115k / 75k

Fri, Sat, Sun : session 1 0900-1400
session 2 1500-2000
50k / 115k / 75k

View from outside Kidzania

Holiday season : session 1 0900-1400
session 2 1500-2000
100k / 155k / 155k

NB : if you're a grandparent >65 with 2 or more grandchildren in tow, you get to go in free... Otherwise it's the standard fare. Hmm, I wonder i one can get away with 'borrowing' grandchildren...

As many stations as I can remember

Theatre, magic show, hp art studio, ponds sunsilk beauty saloon, burger place, pizza place, window washing, cosmos electrical shop, indomart, BCA, tax office (hee hee), yakult lab, archeological site, hospital (couple of different things there, there's a pretty lifelike surgery station), dentist, photo studio, fire station, construction site, wall painting, police station, telkomsel workshop, news station, radio station, Aqua bottling plant, Kapal Api factory, Walls ice cream factory, biscuit factory, cookie factory, milk production plant (box milk ok!! Not human!), baby nursery (kids are the nurses learning to diaper and clean baby dolls. Good for moms wanting to see if their kids might help with a younger sib??), Flight simulator, go kart track, driving track, driviers lessons... Waxworks pending... I definitely haven't got it all. Let me know what I've missed. Oh, and if the kids get tired, there are mini blue/ silver bird taxis and buses to get to their next destination... Pay in Kidzos please. Other currencies not accepted... Forget it big people, apart from the driver, no adult allowed. Check out the photo, the 'cab driver' can't even sit up straight!!

Day 2 without The Man

It'a amazing how much time I end up wasting when the The Man is not around to chivvy me along. Last night I ended up taking a little cat nap at 10pm. Not advisable... Couldn't sleep proper till past 1am. That would never happen if he were here. He'd probably just drag me to the bathroom by my ankles and leave me in a heap. After all, HE needs his sleep and he can't relax if I'm cluttering up the bed...

Having a bit of extra time on my hands, I thought I'd work on this year's Christmas presents and possible bazaar offerings. I have given up trying to buy anything for my folks. It's impossible. For my mom I painted a 2 little Japanese girls on plates. She doesn't like water marks on her table, so this should do the trick. I also painted a tile to use as a trivet. I would post photos, but as usual, the connection here is so poor that stuff just gets clogged up like Monday morning traffic. Will try another time...

Am rather tired tonight. Probably last night catching up with me. The key now is not to let myself have another cat nap! I have to be full of beans for tomorrow. Kiddo and I will be going to Kidzania for the first time ever with some friends. Selamat malam all...

You say to-mah-to, I say to-may-to...

Everyone knows that Malaysia and Indonesia are neighbours and practically share an identical language (no, I am NOT getting into the politics of it). Even so, the differences make living here an incredible adventure... After many blank looks and 'uhhhh...'s I have had to change the way I speak bahasa. I know I'm improving because I don't get so many blank looks now... Also the multi-talented Mr.D is an incredible walking fount of all things Indonesian.

I thought I'd share some common things that tripped me up in my early days here in Jakarta. I get into lots of trouble because I tend to chat to everyone. As Hubs likes to say, I speak more to our staff in 5mins than he does in 2 months... Then again, he doesn't go much beyond, 'buat kopi, ya' (make coffee) and 'pulang rumah' (go home).

One of my hobbies is shopping. Not quite a shopaholic, but I loooovvveeee browsing. Jakarta is great because there is a mall for every walk of life selling anything and everything. My source of all things money related, ie The Man, once told me that he read somewhere that Jakarta has the most number of malls per capita than any other Asian country. There are close to 30mil people in Jakarta. That's more than the WHOLE of Malaysia. That's mind boggling... So, there I was, a newcomer to Jakarta, and I thought I'd pop into this store and get something for kiddo. The lovely shopgirl (they're ALL nice, All beautiful and actually know their job!) asked me if kiddo was a boy or a girl. Except she didn't say, 'laki atau perempuan?' like we do in KL. It was 'cewek atau cowok?' On seeing my blank stare, she then said, 'boy or girl Ibu?' I definitely know I'm not the only one who has had these encounters. Occasionally they will say 'putra' (prince) or 'puteri' (princess). That at least sounds better. Somehow 'cewek' and 'cowok' just sound to me like they're describing bodily functions of some sort. Ok, they've worked out it's for a girl, umur 5 (age 5). Then comes the 'rok' (skirt), 'celana' (trousers), kaos (shirt), 'blos' (blouse), dress (YES!! that's the same! But I think it's for my benefit. Haven't mustered the energy to ask what it is in BI yet) discussion. All I can say is I'm glad I generally shop when the stores first open at 10am as I usually get about 3 or 4 sales people around me and between us I have so far always been able to get what I want.

Oh and shoes are 'sepatu' not 'kasut'; fridges are 'kulkas' not 'peti sejuk'; rabbits are 'kelinci' not 'arnab'; frogs are 'kodok' not 'katak'; glue is 'lem'; carrots are 'wortel'; motocycles are 'motor', cars are 'mobil' not 'kereta', 'kereta' is short for 'kereta api' which is train. I remember Mr.D's predecessor insisting that there were no 'kereta' in our area when we were plainly stuck in the middle of a traffic jam... Which is 'macet' in BI.

The list goes on and on. My staff are great. If I say something weird, they just laugh and tell me the correct word to use. Latest discussion was on sentence fillers... I've worked out 'dong' and 'sih', but 'kok' (!!!!).... Sorry, I just don't think I will ever be able to just drop 'kok' into a sentence with a straight face.